Wednesday, May 26, 2010
what do you get someone when you know its the last thing you'll ever be giving them?
it's not easy to answer that qsn.
school is the biggest waste of time!
like 4 periods of tamil and then jc talks.
tmr, SAME.
wthhhhhhhh.
i mean too much tamil is boring): even if its mr omer and whatnot.
i want to go to ikea.
had a really scary dream early this morning.
no, not ghost all.
you were angry with me, with us.
it was so scary that i woke up believing it really happened.
and i was really confused and sad.
and that dream was totally not helpful at all.
wrong timingggg.
buddayeee):
senior buddayeeee):
you tend to think of someone even more than usual when its their special day.
and i really dont think im strong enough):
and i thought of you♥
«Wednesday, May 26, 2010»
Y
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
could you try imagining this:
sat in the corner away from all the noise. my head was spinning, i didn't know what was happening. i closed my eyes and tried to drown out all the noise, but it was just too hard. there was just too much that people had to say, too many opinions that people had to form. i had to find an escape, i had to get out.
well i guess everyone can understand that. i mean everyone experiences it. the secret whispers that eventually reach your ears. those unexplainable glares and puzzling silences. life could be so simple if there were'nt people to judge and people to misunderstand.
i tied the piece of cloth around my eyes. i could feel the breeze in my hair. it made me feel light, like i could fly away with the wind. i took a step in front till my toes were at the edge. i looked up at the sky and smile. my heart fluttered in its little cage as i took a deep breath in. i spread my arms wide and leaned forward. i fell, down i went plunging into air. i couldn't see. but i could feel myself disappearing. but i was gone. before the pain could hit me i was gone.
gah, was thinking abt doing that when i was sitting at the top of the spiderweb. nice feeling. sometimes it just seems like whatever you do is not enough eh. maybe people expect too much. oh wells. i want achu's mummy and stickling and sickling and goat and 2007. (yes, this is not achu blogging)
because i understand that we all need love and i'm not afraid.
i feel the love, but i dont feel that way
-these lines make me feel sad.
ok thank you achu for letting me blog after 3 years. honestly, doesnt make me feel any better, but it feels like i put sth in my heart right again. thank you (haha, i have got to make it colourful now :x)
and i thought of you♥
«Tuesday, May 25, 2010»
Y
hello.
marina barrage tdy.
was calming.
soaking in the ankle deep water playground, battle[the name of our new bat shaped kite(bat + table)] flying, soccer and just lazing ard.
satisfying.
except that no one wanted to continue playing soccer! gundusss.
we had half time 5 mins after we started the "game" cos we realised all our staminas suck! hahaha.
i want more/:
feel like some freshly cooked lobster at the moment.
skin's still hot and there seems to be a temporarily permenant blush on my cheeks.
feel's kinda cool though.
nice.
and now the day's coming to a bleh ending.
as usual.wonderful.
last day of papers and i dont feel relieved or anything, weirdly.
should stay away from the com, its so spirit dampening/:
i really dowan to go to skl tmr):
hai.
hello mummy.
as weird as it sounds, heh, i keep having the urge to see/talk to you nowadays.
it's really random and i cant explain why.
everything feels so messed up and screwed.
like just seeing you from far or smth will magically fix things, i know it will.
i miss you so much i feel like crying/:
because your presence is always comforting. and nth's ever comforting anymore):
cos somehow you are definitely different from anyone else i've ever known.
the whole world can change,it has. but you always remain constant, and thats what we love abt you.
a mummy like you's impossible to find. really really.
i dunno what im trying to say but ah, shucks/:
i wish we were still in sec one):
i wish we could still see you everyday):
i want my mummy)):
why do we have to grow up?):
and i thought of you♥
«Tuesday, May 25, 2010»
Y
Friday, May 21, 2010
which part of
FREE does the stupid internet not understand?
and i thought of you♥
«Friday, May 21, 2010»
Y
Monday, May 17, 2010
i feel my lit skills improving(:
and telepathy skills too(: now can long distance ald ah, haha.
chem is fun!
today was an interesting bouncy day.
hello friend, its been way too long): im allowed to call you that again right? haha.
the track is a hot place to be.
school suckssssssssssss.
and i thought of you♥
«Monday, May 17, 2010»
Y
Sunday, May 16, 2010
school again tmr.
damn boring siaaaaa.
its so annoying that im almost always annoyed in school nowadays.
discovering hypocrites, plastic faces, ppl who dont really care, ppl who claim to be friends, ppl who use others etc etc.
yea yea i know im not perfect either.
but this is really damn pissing.
people of my own age group are annoying.
i dont care what anyone thinks.
im tired of putting on a show.
you go around with a group of ppl.
thinking they're the best bunch of ppl you've known.
you might even act, think and feel the same way towards most things.
but then one day you take a closer look at these ppl.
perhaps from an outsider's point of view.
attention seeking bunch.
yucks.
friends doesnt just mean ppl whom you hangout with.
ppl you lend a listening ear to, lend a shoulder to cry on, serve as a pillar of strength to,
say a few comforting words to.
until one day you'll come to a point where you ask, whats in it for me?
and you realise there's absolutely nth.
you shouldnt do things expecting sth in return, we all know that.
but you're human too.
you'll get tired too, wont you?
you may think i sound like a hypocrite.
think what thou wilt.
i am thankful for aircon.
despite the misunderstandings and whatnot, i realise i can be myself with you, and there're very few ppl like that for me. thank you friend, thank you.
i love the weather.
its raininggg.
haha, hunting down pri skl mates with priyan. damn retarded.
Me
yea lost contact too
Kuha
muz find her
Me
she's not on fb ah?
Kuha
i don't noe
Kuha
madhu in wat school
Me
tanjong katong girls'. cant find her on fb.
Kuha
she don't have ah
Kuha
cannot find her in frenster too
Me
best lar, dont think she has. how to find man.
Kuha
find sharaniya
Me
dont have alsooo.
Kuha
marvellous
Me
HAHA.
okay thats the end of me.
this is too embarrassing.
i have thrown my face far far away, to another planet even.
bye.
and i thought of you♥
«Sunday, May 16, 2010»
Y
no mummy nooooooooD:
and i thought of you♥
«Sunday, May 16, 2010»
Y
Saturday, May 15, 2010
im sorry i sound so rude.
really sorry.
okay really weird thoughts are filling my head.
it's just a bloody picture.
pictures lie all the time.
tell me what im thinking isnt true.
please please please.
talking to you would be so much easier.
why did we stop?):
take a knife and stab me once and for all please.
instead of killing me slowly everyday.
and yes, i may actually die for you.
im weird.
im selfish.
im mad.
im crazy.
im freaking out.
im thinking too much like you always said i did.
mummy, i
need to ask you sth.
and until then i shall live in denial.
and i thought of you♥
«Saturday, May 15, 2010»
Y
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
And she said she could see y'all from the stands!(:
oh manD: hurrr hurrrrr hurrrrrrrrrrrrr):
im currently zee saddest person on earth okay.
and i thought of you♥
«Wednesday, May 12, 2010»
Y
ya'll won(:
and you scored both the goals!!(((((((((((((((((((((((((:
so so proud of you.
couldnt stop myself from screaming. buddaye too.
ya'll were awesome darl.
but we lost.
couldn't even say congrats):
i should be happy.
at least we got to see you play.
you were the coolest and most awesome player on that field(: really.
what's this man.
hated you so much for a moment.
how fair is it you tell me.
perusa for the name only.
after that, anyhowww.
BULLSHIT.
wah. we suck lar)):
and i thought i had run out of tears.
and i thought of you♥
«Wednesday, May 12, 2010»
Y
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
hello.
obviously you wont see this but yea.
we'll be there tmr, cheering you on.
feels kinda uninvited. but we're dying to see you play, sorry if you're unhappy/:
i know you'll do your best.
and your team too.
good luck.
jiayou, all the way(:
withdrawal symptoms can kill you.
and i thought of you♥
«Tuesday, May 11, 2010»
Y
Monday, May 10, 2010
tdy just wasnt 4N's day.
lit test though we didnt want it. qsns were okay though.
supp to have free period to study after that but et came and wanted to do amaths but we didnt bring what he wanted and he didnt bring what we wanted.
therefore we did maths. quite productive actually.
then bio SPA right after thattt.
dunno why but i was panicking throughout. it was okay i guess.
should work faster next time.
powder fight after school was funnn(:
hmm, my heart seems to be on a roller coaster ride.
aiyeee.
OoooOOooO.
buddaye date was a success.
flower pot for my athai, nice one man. we wanted a single flower and it became a whole pot. nvm ah, for our mother only(:
wednesday wednesday wednesdayyy.
ah what to do what to do.
it's really our last chance.
i want.
die die must go.
when i looked at athai tdy,
i realised how much you look like her.
it was like i was looking at you yet not looking at you.
went speechless for a while.
and then i realised how much i really miss you.
its not the same, even though i may say it everyday.
i need you like a heart needs a beat,
its nothing new.
so maybe its true,
i can't live without you.
and i thought of you♥
«Monday, May 10, 2010»
Y
Sunday, May 9, 2010
hello.
happy mother's day to my dear mother and my mummy dearest and all the other mothers in the world!:D
mummy i didnt send you the card i got for you!):
always like that):
aircon's like the only person i've been talking to properly these days.
its nice talking to her.
im always here friend(:
buddaye date tmr again.
hope it'll go smoothly.
always does, excetpt for all the walking.
there's always so much walking!
gosh i feel like tearing away my skin and destroying myself.
hahaha.
I'll watch the night turn light bluebut its not the same without youbecause it takes two to whisper quietlythe silence isnt so badtill i look at my hands and feel sadcos the spaces between my fingers are right where yours fit perfectly-bye.
and i thought of you♥
«Sunday, May 09, 2010»
Y
Thursday, May 6, 2010
second day of missing school.
feels quite good to be away from it all(:
more rest days please.
oh whatever. srsly.
guess we can never have what we wish for.
well maybe we can, but it's only temporary.
im never truly happy anymore cos when it happens, i just wait for everything to crumble and go back to how it was.
happens all the time.
should just stop talking to everyone.
more peaceful that way.
save the head and heart ache.
hello love, please be okay):not even in the position to comfort you anymore/:
and i thought of you♥
«Thursday, May 06, 2010»
Y
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
patty.you.are.killing.me.
and i thought of you♥
«Wednesday, May 05, 2010»
Y
so pretty my heart could shatter.hello hello.
prelims have begun.
killer papers up next.
bagussssss.
hai.
hate to see this happeningD:
brings back memories.
at least you know when it ended/:
where's my buddaye i need to tell her an emergency thing buddaye!!
why she never say?
hurr hurr hurr):
dont friend you lar hmph.
sth's wrong with this blogger.
our hands are tied.
sorry guest....---...
and i thought of you♥
«Wednesday, May 05, 2010»
Y